grousing

Well, it's raining again here in northern Indiana. Our area wasn't too badly hit this last week. However, Gary to the northwest and Kouts to the southeast were. Large areas lost electricity. Three days later tens of thousands were still without service. We had a dry hot spring and now that the dry period is here we are getting the rain. Go figure.

I am about two weeks away from finishing my sister-in-laws quilt. The anniversary was celebrated two weeks ago. I just told her that her quilt needed a bit more work. At least they could enjoy the sheets and pillowcases on which mom put a crocheted edging.

We have both been grousing lately about not being able to find what we want in our local stores. We have wonderful shopping generally; but, more and more when we go looking for something particular we have a hard time finding it. When she looked for the sheet/pillowcase set to edge (and when she looked for earlier sets for a couple of my other siblings) what she found did not satisfy her at all. She couldn't find the colors she wanted and had to settle for something other than what she wanted. The hems were shoddily done and the pillowcases had mismatched seams. These would once have been sold at a cut rate as seconds but not any more. Then she couldn't find the color of crochet thread she wanted and again had to settle for something else.

I tried to find an afghan hook in a smaller size than I had on hand. The Hancock Fabrics we once had has closed and Walmart is getting out of the needlecraft and fabric business. Target and K-mart did that a long time ago. That leaves Michaels as the only chain store for needlework but they have reduced their crochet thread and shifted their stocks of yarn to emphasize the new 'funky' yarns (you know--the eyelash, and fur lines) that I really don't like to crochet with. The only afghan hood available was in a set of hooks for beginning crocheters and was the same size as the ones I already have. Once some many years ago I stopped shopping at Michaels because they shifted to a fad needlework I didn't like. I guess I will have to stop shopping there again. Luckily we have a local yarn shop, Sheep's Clothing, that did carry what I needed. I love their yarns but they are pricey.

Many, many years ago I read economists who thought that the trends toward automation and computerization would create a commercial world in which anyone could easily get anything almost custom made for them. What a crock. What has happened is we have an economy dominated by chain stores in which only those items which will sell zillions of units are carried. A recent guest poster on the Time Goes By blog noted the difficulty finding shampoo for her gray hair. She finally found one brand on the bottom shelf and bought both of the bottles that were left. Anyone who colors her hair or is blond, brunette, or red-headed can find all kinds of products. But not someone who refuses to buy into the youth orientation which demands that the gray haired cover the gray and pretend the years haven't passed.

What we have is an economy that serves the young and has no interest in anyone else. TV is dominated by the 18 to 34 crowd. We have complained for sometime about how uninteresting the offerings are. We either saw it and don't want to see it again, never wanted to see it in the first place, or liked it so well we can watch our own copy without commercial interruption. And we have been doing a lot of that last option lately.

I guess I am really very tired of an economy which doesn't meet my needs, doesn't see any profit in meeting my needs and doesn't even provide suitable alternatives. I don't want to settle for what those overpaid bastards in the corporate offices offer and be grateful for it. I am not in the least grateful. Most of the time I am pretty damn pissed.

I can't believe it has been two weeks since my last post. Last month was incredibly frustrating. I felt as though I couldn't do anything right. What I learned about my job seemed to get lost in the doing. I realize that have to be faster and more accurate than I have been ever before and that I am dealing with a complex computer system that makes mistakes almost inevitable. But so many mistakes???? I wonder too if I am putting too much pressure on myself. I know I am a would be perfectionist. "Would be?" you ask. Well I am a perfectionist who knows the futility of that on an intellectual level but I still get angry and frustrated with myself when I am not perfect. The problem is how to strive for perfection without beating myself up emotionally when I am not. In my needlework I often joke that I have never needed a 'humility block' because I have made plenty of inadvertent mistakes. The difference is that my mistakes at work are noticed while those in the needlework will rarely, if ever, be noticed.

Well, yesterday was a good day even if it was slow. Only one small and easily correctable mistake and everything was on an even keel at the end.

My brother's and sister-in-law's 30th anniversary was last weekend. I did not get her quilt done in time. I need another three weeks to finish. I told my mother we would invite her out to lunch and give her the quilt then. Then I really must finish the little embroidered figures for Mom's jacket. I have only been working on them, in between other things, for two years.

Of course, everyone needs a break now and then. Mine consisted of reading the last Harry Potter and watching 300 and The Fountain. The last was strange. I don't know what to make of it and it certainly was not what I expected. I will have to see it again sometime and try to get a handle on it. The photography was wonderful as were the effects in 300. And, as a sometime student of history, I found a good deal to quibble with regarding 300. First, the Spartans didn't start the war with Persia. That was started a generation before by the Athenians when they sent aid to the Greek city states on the Anatolian (present day Turkey) coast and islands when they rebelled against their Persian masters. The Persian Emperor Darias was not pleased and decided the Athenians needed to be taught a lesson. Unfortunately for him, he lost the battle at Marathon and died before he could try a second time and his son, Xerxes, was left with the task of disciplining the Greeks.

I find the words put into the characters' mouths about freedom somewhat ironic. After all, the Spartan economy was based on slave labor. How else could the Spartan men be dedicated soldiers? The film showed the young Leonidas killing a wolf as a rite of passage to manhood. But it failed to mention that another such rite of passage was the deliberate murder of a Helot, as the state owned serfs (slaves) were called, in hand-to-hand combat without being caught in the act. But then I have become disenchanted with our semi-religious cant on the theme of freedom. I often have to ask: freedom for what? Freedom from what? Freedom for whom? I suspect that those of our leaders who use the word most frequently would rather those questions not be asked or answered.

I have other quibbles concerning the film. And in spite of them, I rather liked it.

new job, sister-in-law's quilt

I have been a bit slack about getting on here. More focused on starting that new job I mentioned. The only thing I hate worse than job hunting is starting a new job, or, as all too frequently in the past, a new academic program. There is always such a level of uncertainty. Are you going to like the job? Are you going to like the environment and the people? How difficult will it be to learn the job? So the last two and a half weeks have been somewhat nerve wracking and anxious. So far it has not been bad. At least I can say I am not bored. There is so much new stuff to learn and I sometimes feel that my head is stuffed with mush.

I have never had any great difficulty learning anything before. But I find I am a little slower that I used to be. And I don't remember things as quickly and accurately as I did. I forgot my passwords the first day and had to get new ones set up. I know they say we shouldn't write them down but even passwords I think I will remember easily I mess up. Maybe it will get easier and with the exercise I will be able to keep them in mind more readily.

One thing I liked about the business when I went in for my interview was there was no one under the age of 40 there. It was different during training. Almost all of the other trainees were high school juniors and seniors. But they were all assigned to other branches. I don't mind working with younger people. However, for the last several years I have felt that my age has been against me. It is as though all my education and experience counts for nothing.

To sum up the last two weeks: I am hopeful and I find I am enjoying my job. I hope it works out well.

It goes with out much comment that I have done little in the way of needlework. The quilt I am constructing for my sister-in-law will not be done before the 30th anniversary festivities. I will simply give my brother his quillow and show his wife the quilt blocks I have done. I think I have about another two months work on the quilt to finish. Above are two of the blocks. I am using the eyelash yarn to create a fur trim for the jacket. Both are further along now. I have completed the trim on all but one of the figures and am looking for cute buttons and beads to add. I found a really cute bead shaped like a red bow that I put on the second figure. It makes a nice bow tie. I will have to take some up-to-date pictures because all of the blocks are much further along than these show.

This second quilt is really a work in progress. I wander into a shop and suddenly see something that is perfect. On one of the evenings after training I went into a JoAnn's Fabric shop and found some buttons shaped like carrots. They were way more expensive than I really wanted to pay but I bought them anyway. They will make wonderful noses for the snowpeople. Other customers must have thought I was a bit loco because I giggled all the way to the register.

new job and other bits and pieces

Well, I have a new job. At least I won't be job hunting for a while. I was, or will have been, unemployed for only two months by the time I start the new gig. I was not at all hopeful when I started. It took me almost 7 months to find the last long term job and almost 9 months to find the one before that.

Last week was a bit of a downer, except for the job offer. I was still looking and seeing nothing interesting. It is amazing how few jobs out there offer little more than a pittance for the body and nothing for the soul. I have had very nice contacts with my new employers which encourages my optimism. I hadn't looked forward to a new job. I merely needed to work because otherwise my cats and I would not eat.

I haven't done much on the quilt for my sister-in-law and I have to get on the stick if I am to have it done before their anniversary. But for some reason I preferred to read. I had two new books: Aaron Elkins' newest (the title of which I have forgotten) and Laurel Hamilton's Harlequin. I had a sense of deja vu with Elkins book. It seemed to combine elements of Make No Bones and Unnatural Selection. That says something when I can remember the titles of previous books but not the one just read. It was a pleasant read but not one of his best. was also not one of the strongest of Hamilton's Anita Blake series. She tried to tie up some loose ends but not as well as hoped. Her best I think was Obsidian Butterfly one of the best horror/mystery novels I can name. Otherwise, I re-read three of the CSI series before giving them to the local senior activity center. Good enough, but not keepers. And I re-read Margaret Maron's Right Jack. It went back on the shelf. I have always loved Maron's Sigrid Harald and I love the growth of the character over the series. I wish she would continue it. I have only read a couple of her Deborah Knot series, but those have never lured me deeper into the series.

correction and continuation

I apologize to poor Paris. I minimized her suffering. She actually spent somewhere between 72 and 75 hours in jail, depending on which report was accurate. Either way that is more that the 24 I mentioned. This story has been going on so long I lost tract of time.

Since then the Judge has ordered her back to jail for the full 45 days less time served. According to MSNBC the Sheriff decided to allow her to serve her time under house arrest all on his own. He further commented that he thought she got a tougher sentence than other young celebrities charged with similar offenses. First point: last I heard it isn't a sheriff's job to change the terms of a sentence. That prerogative belongs to a judge. Second point: it doesn't really matter what he thought of the toughness of her sentence. It is merely his job to carry out the sentence, not adjust it to meet his notions of fairness.

To tell the truth, however, I am heartily sick of all these celebrities acting up, getting loads of publicity, going into rehab, apologizing abjectly and going out to sin again. I am also heartily sick of the fact that I can't get away from them unless I am willing to cut myself off totally from everything else that goes on. The nightly news leads off with these stories and covers them in nauseating detail. Then follows up with blow by blow coverage of the latest fight masquerading as whatever ball game until they are forced to give the scores as the time for the segment runs out. Between the two, and the commercials, we get precious little news.

I wish the mainstream media would take the example of the Kentucky restaurant owner who refused to serve O.J. Simpson Derby weekend. I wish they would 'just say no' to Paris, Lindsay, Brittany, and David (Hasselhoff). But then the networks would actually have to hire real reporters. And wouldn't that be awful. I shouldn't be so hard on the news readers, though. Several times they gave the story their campiest best and even asked if they really had to read 'this stuff.' Somebody, somewhere, has decided that this crap is what the audience really wants to hear. I, for one, don't; but no one is listening to me.

Libby, Hilton and Law

Well, Scooter Libby has been convicted and is now appealing his conviction and his sentence. It must be nice to have such powerful and influential friends to appear as "character" witnesses. My only question is "What in the hell does Kissinger's opinion of Libby's character have to do with anything?" Or any of the other witnesses detailed in TomPaine.com's article. The man has been convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice. It doesn't matter if his family, friends, and business associates found him to be a good man in their dealings with him. Those dealings had nothing to do with perjury and obstruction. I am cynical enough that I am surprised that he got two and a half years. I am too used to people in his position getting off with slaps on the wrist.

I remember having similar thoughts listening to the accounts of the pre-sentencing hearings for former Illinois governor Jim Ryan. He had a parade of witnesses attesting to what a great man he was. Almost all of them were anti-death penalty advocates who thought the world of his commutations for death row inmates and the moratorium he placed on the death penalty. As much as I favor his actions in that matter, I fail to see what his actions in that case had to do with his conviction for corruption. And why should that be a mitigating factor in the sentence a judge would hand down for the conviction on corruption?

Poor little Paris Hilton actually suffered through a day and a night in jail. Now, according to MSNBC, her sentence has been commuted to 40 days house arrest with a tracking anklet. How nice it must be to have a famous name, money, an expensive lawyer, and a tame psychiatrist on retainer. Anyone I know who had a DUI (with a probation), a conviction for driving on a suspended license while on probation from the DUI, and a conviction for driving without a license would have had the book thrown at them. Our mental fragility would have failed to impress any judge we would have faced and we couldn't afford the kind of attorney and psychiatrist that would manage to manipulate the system to get us off.

Once upon a time we used to boast that no one was above the law and many of us actually believed it was true. I haven't heard that boast in a very long time. But then I shouldn't be so surprised. We have a President who has done his best to make his office above the law for himself and whoever might follow him and to make it the supreme branch of government beyond effective oversight from the once co-equal legislative and judicial branches. If a President, who after all is just a man (whether God talks to him or not), is above the law why shouldn't others also be above the law. Laws it seems are merely advisory, effective only when the police are present and not occupied with other matters, or for those without money and connections.

Chalmers Johnson/American Empire

I have just finished reading Johnson's Sorrows of Empire and enough of Nemesis to know where he is going with it. They are both quite good and make a number of points that we would be wise to remember.

President Bush said that the 9/11 attacks happened because the "terrorists" envied our freedom, our wealth and our democracy. It is almost as if Bush has historical amnesia. We have a long and, for the most part, dubious history in the Middle East. We have done many things there that would incite justifiable anger, not envy. Why are the Iranians so difficult to deal with? Well, does anyone remember 1953? The CIA engineered the overthrow of an elected government, reinstalled the Shah, and then supported his brutal (but pro-American) regime for the next 36 years. Does anyone remember that we supported Saddam Hussein in his brutal war against Iran? He ultimately lost that war but decided to use his excess American supplied weaponry to settle his long standing and contested claim to Kuwait.

To say that the attack happened because "they" envy "us" is to forget everything that went before in a long and sordid history. That isn't to say that the victims, the individual victims, of 9/11 deserved what they got. They didn't. Unfortunately, they bore the direct brunt of the anger directed at our government because they were what al Qaida could reach.

One of Robert Heinlein's characters (I think it was Lazarus Long in Time Enough for Love) misquoted Lincoln "In a government of the people, by the people, and for the people--DON'T TELL THE PEOPLE." That is a principle our government has been following faithfully for a very, very long time. However, if we aren't informed can the officials who govern us truly claim to have our consent? That would be like a physician claiming that his patient consented to treatment he was never informed of or, worse, was deliberately misinformed about. Like describing chemotherapy as a vitamin regimen? Supposedly, our representatives stand in for us in the process of giving consent. However, if those representatives are given misleading and false information, they can't give any more meaningful consent in our names than we can on our own. There is a lot of evidence surfacing that the administration cherry picked data, chose to believe unreliable sources because they supplied the information the administration wanted to hear, presented overly optimistic assessments of the consequences of its actions, and generally blew a lot of smoke to obscure any information that countered its chosen gospel. That completely undercuts the fundamental premises of democratic society and government.